Positive future fantasy
Are you creating a positive future fantasy or are you creating awfulizing how bad things can be? Last week in Mastermind, I referenced the notion of creating a positive future fantasy. Several of you have emailed me asking for more information on this and it has been a topic of discussing in my offices this week.
Before I tell you how to create a positive future fantasy, let’s look at how we create negative future fantasies.
Awfulizing is something that we all do. Awfulizing is imagining the worst case scenario. Often, it takes the form of “What if this happens?” or “What if that happens?”
I have often talked about how in Paradise Lost, John Milton said that the mind is its own place, and in itself can make heaven out of Hell and hell out of Heaven. Over the years, I have witnessed many clients who were caught up in all that was wrong in their life and had lost sight of all the good in their life. The experiences they shared were past traumas and yet their mental, emotional and physical reality was as if these events were occurring in that moment. They were wrapped up in the negative self-hypnosis trance of fear and anxiety.
Sometimes, people are so wrapped up in their story that when I suggest that there is an alternative story that they can create and live, they cling desperately to their story of fear and anxiety.
When we are stressed, when we are fearful, we begin to look for everything that is wrong and we filter out all that is good. If someone is five minutes late in picking you up, you spend four minutes and fifty-nine seconds remembering every other time that person was late. And then you add to it all other memories (real or imagined) of every time someone else showed up late in your life, or worse yet, just didn’t show up at all!
With these thoughts of disappointment you feel hurt, sad, fearful, unloved and angry. Then it’s off to the races in the Fight or Flight Response which triggers an even more eager negative fantasy adventure which produces an even stronger Fight or Flight Response. Your brain filters out that you may love the person that is late and filters all that is good and kind about the person who is picking you up.
Is this internal temper tantrum, this anxiety attack, sounding familiar? I’ve yet to meet anyone with a pulse that doesn’t experience this in one form or another. I know that I sure do. I think that making hell out of Heaven is part of being human.
When you spin out of control with the negative thoughts and emotions you are in a powerful trance. Your body reacts just as if it’s being attacked creating toxins that weaken your immune system leaving you feeling exhausted. The internal atmosphere that is created is toxic and abusive, beating you down and holding you back.
Your mind is designed to filter out large amounts of information keeping you from going mad. You simply cannot pay conscious attention to every single detail being collected with what you see, what you hear, what you smell, what you taste and what you feel. For instance, you probably aren’t thinking about the little toe on your left foot. And now you are. When you are focused on the fear and anxiety your mind filters out the love, joy and goodness in your life.
Creating a positive future fantasy
Creating a positive future fantasy takes purposeful intention. Awfulizing is already hardwired. Your goal now is to unhook the awfulizing neurons and hardwire new neuropathways for creating the positive future that you desire.
One of the many benefits of creating a positive future fantasy is that you are being mindful, living in the moment. You are calm and relaxed and you are boosting your immune system. Not only do you feel better, you are happier and you have more energy to achieve your goal. You can then focus on the love, joy and goodness in your life. You begin noticing the little things like the flower that is about to bloom or the smile and kind word that someone offers you.
You can use this process for pretty much anything that you do in your life. You can use this for the next meeting you are about to enter, you can use this to set the tone for your day and you can use this for your next great life adventure. Anything that you want to have happen in the future, use this process.
Process for creating a positive future fantasy
- Begin by becoming mindful. Wiggle your toes, wiggle your butt, take a deep breath in through your nose and let it out through your mouth. Close your eye lids, relax and use the power of your mind to imagine, play or pretend. You can either choose to limit the power of your imagination or allow your imagination to be limitless.
- Think for a moment about the last thing that has to happen so that you know you have achieved your goal. (Is it trying on the new clothes now that you’ve lost weight? Is it seeing that your paycheck reflects your raise? Is it laying on a Maui beach or receiving the confirmation of your airline ticket? Or, it can be crawling into bed at night at the end of a wonderful day.)
- In the privacy of your mind, create the image of your successful achievement. Make this as vivid as possible: What do you hear? What do you think? What do you feel? What do you smell? Notice any other sensations. Allow yourself to experience your happy dance and shouts of joy when you step on the scale and it reflects your goal weight. Here the congratulations from family and friends when you cross the finish line. Feel the joy and excitement of success in your body. (Be sure to also notice where in your body you feel this and remember it so that you can easily access this again in the future)
- Now step out of that scene and in your mind’s eye, create a photograph of that successful conclusion.
- With that photo in your hand, float out of your body and carry that photo into your future timeline. Trust your unconscious mind to know how far into the future to carry it. Depending on your goal, it could be just one hour to the end of your meeting or it could be weeks, months or even years into the future.
- When you are at the last thing that has to happen so that you know you have achieved success, gently release the photo into your future timeline.
- Allow yourself to float 15 minutes further into your future and float into your timeline and turn towards now.
- Notice how everything between then and now align itself to support this successful conclusion. Mentally Rehearse creating your positive future fantasy in reverse. See, feel, imagine or experience yourself successfully accomplishing each step all along the way all the way back to now. Be sure to make note of any steps along that way that hadn’t yet occurred to you.
- When this feels complete, return back into your body, feeling your feet on the floor, your butt in the chair, taking a deep breath in through your nose and letting it out through your mouth.
- Take a moment and allow yourself to totally experience success. Live with the joy of your positive future fantasy. Incorporate this process into your Greatest Expression of You daily practice.
Win in your own fantasy
In grad school, we were frequently told, “It’s foolish not to win in your own fantasy!” Are you winning in your fantasies or are you awfulizing? It really is a choice and the choice is yours.
I love your feedback and questions that I receive in your emails and in sessions in my office. Please, let me know about your experiences of creating your positive future fantasy.
Your Hypnosis Health Info Hypnotic Suggestion for today:
I choose to win in my positive future fantasy!
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