Are you hiding behind excess weight? Do you keep yourself from losing weight for protection? Do you need to be fat to feel safe? When you lose weight and get close to your goal do you sabotage yourself and put the weight back on? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then Slender For Life™ hypnosis for weight loss can help you to overcome your fears and achieve your healthy ideal goal weight. Weight loss hypnosis can help you overcome your mental and emotional roadblocks that have led you to past diet failures. What are you hiding behind? is this weeks reading from my book, Becoming Slender For Lfe.
What are you hiding behind?
After my Slender For Life™ clients completed their initial individual sessions, we used to do a weekly group session while they progressed toward their ideal weight goal. One week the scheduled topic was fat. I had my prepared notes. I had the hypnosis script ready to go. I was all set. One man, I’ll call him Bill, was sharing his experience of recently being stuck in a pattern of up a pound or two, down a pound or two. I asked what that was all about. “I don’t know,” he responded, “I wish I knew.” We had been there before. Bill had a pattern where he would drop three to five pounds, and then gain one or two pounds. He was down 59 pounds and had another 50 pounds to go. Often, his excuse was work-related stresses.
Then I asked about his identity, if he thought of himself as a 180-pound person or a 239-pound person. What unfolded was a captivating discussion about our false self and our authentic or real self. Bill believed that the excess weight was part of his identity, a part of who he was as a person. Weight was used as an excuse to distance himself from his partner and to insulate himself from friends and family—to keep them from getting too close. He used eating as an excuse to take a break at work and to self-medicate when stressed.
Bill used weight to keep from being the big V: VULNERABLE.
We began to discuss the authentic self and this false self. With tears in their eyes, others in the group started sharing about rejecting their authentic self and even hating their authentic self just as they hated their body. Some stated that they had no understanding of their real self. Wanting to find a way to illustrate this concept, I drew a diagram on the white board. (see above)
We talked about hiding behind the weight and hiding behind false beliefs that we held to be true about ourselves. Embracing the authentic self was so foreign to what most of us were taught that it seemed wrong and even selfish.
A different kind of identity issue came up in a consultation with Robert, who is in his 70s. He told me that he was a former bodybuilder. As a younger man, he was big and strong; he felt powerful. He associated personal power and strength with size. Today he is no longer a body builder, nor is he physically strong. In fact, his excess weight had weakened him. He was big all right, but fat had now replaced muscle. Robert’s fear was that if he lost his excess weight, he would be small—which meant that he was weak. I am sorry to say that Robert chose not to do Slender For Life™, his belief that being at a healthy weight meant that he would be weak was just too ingrained.
And then there is the issue of our family’s and friends’ perception of us. When we as individuals begin to change, we are no longer what our family and friends believe us to be. And when we don’t meet their expectations, that alters their understanding of the world, and they often don’t like that. They want us to be who they think we are, and they’ll work hard at keeping us as they think we are. It’s just like crabs in the crab pot: one crab starts to climb out, and the others pull it back in. Being who we truly are is challenging and often risky. Some may ask: Who do we think we are to believe that we have the right to make choices and to believe we are worthy? The reality is: Who are we not to be worthy? As Nelson Mandela said, “it is our light that frightens us.”
I pointed out to the group that of course there is another issue. The unconscious mind is very powerful. It creates exactly what we believe to be true; holding on to the perceptions we discussed in Chapter Two. If we believe that we are unworthy, the unconscious mind will deliver unworthiness. The unconscious mind is like my office computer. It’s powerful and yet it’s an idiot. My computer is only as smart as the operator, which has certainly been the bane of numerous tech support people I’ve called for help over the years. Often I can’t get my computer to do what I want it to do, because I don’t know how to do it! It’s that old cassette tape I mentioned earlier playing the same old song. Until we change what we believe to be true, we will continue to create the false self.
In hypnosis, I ask clients to imagine an infinite source of love, healing and light above them that shines into their heart, moves to their brain, and then moves through every cell of their body, illuminating all the darkness within them. It’s as if they’ve been wandering around in a dark scary cavern all these years, tripping over unseen, frightening objects. Then one day, they discover a light switch and they realize that this is not a dark scary cavern, but a beautiful cathedral filled with all the gifts, talents and resources they need for this lifetime. Everything they need is within them.
What are you hiding?
Now ask yourself:
- How have your own self-limiting beliefs kept you from your true self?
- What aspects of your true self have yet to find expression?
- What does your true self know about you that others don’t?
- What hidden talents or gifts would you like to share with others?
So, what about you – do you use weight as a means to insulate yourself from family and friends? Do you use weight to keep you from participating in social events? Self-limiting beliefs can be changed with hypnosis for weight loss.
Your Hypnosis Health Info Hypnotic Suggestion for today:
It’s OK for me to release this excess weight.
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