How are you?
When was the last time you stopped – really stopped – and asked yourself, “How are you?” The September/October 2022 Dessert Health’s lead article asks this important question. I encourage you to read this article – and the whole news paper because it is such an excellent source of wellness information.
Over the past 25 years I have come to realize that most people don’t regularly check with themselves and when I ask them “How are you?” they don’t know. Often, they are taken aback by the question and their lack of self-awareness.
I frequently hear responses such as, “I’m OK” and “I’m fine.” Yet with further exploration there is often anger, hurt, fear and/or sadness under the “I’m OK” and “I’m fine.”
My book, Becoming the Greatest Expression of You, is all about checking in with yourself to see how are you being. A question that I ask myself frequently throughout each day is, “Am I being my best self right now?“
This important question is a way that I suggest that you check in with yourself and find out just how you are in this moment and see if you are OK. So, close your eyelids and find stillness in this moment and ask yourself, “How am I?”
Are you doing OK?
“How are you? When was the last time you stopped – really stopped – and asked yourself this question? The true answer doesn’t come from aching body parts or overwhelmed brain chatter. It is found when you become still, close your eyes, put your hand on your heart and reach deep inside to ask, “Hey there, how are you?”
We should all do this regularly, and today is a good day to start. We’ve been through so much and the need to check in with ourselves is stronger than ever. “I don’t have the time right now” is not an acceptable answer.
As summer comes to a close and season is upon us, our downtime lessens and it is easy to get caught up in the energy of it all. Establishing and maintaining a sense of self awareness is important, as are the accessible tools we can use to ground ourselves when overwhelm sets in: a deep breath, meditation or simply focusing on the sights and sounds around us.
How are you really?
Recently a friend expressed feelings of anxiety she couldn’t understand. Everything in her life seemed positive and good, but her world was spinning – inside and out. Watching her rapidly devour her meal, I asked her to stop, put down her fork and take a deep breath. Then I asked, “But how are you really?” That single action brought self-awareness and started a conversation about her true wellbeing.
We so often plow through our schedules on autopilot feeling exhausted, behind, restless or down. Having the awareness to stop, close our eyes and find stillness can help ground us in that moment. Using our tools can magically transport us to a place of comfort, peace and gratitude. Repeating the practice teaches our mind and body how to make the shift more easily and automatically.
So, check in with yourself more often. A better place may be just a single breath away.”
Read: Desert Health
Your Best Self
If you could be your best self, who would you be? Not what you would do – but who would you BE? To be clear, by “who” I’m not suggesting another person such as a hero, but at your core: If you are being your best self, who are you?
Take a moment right now and close your eyelids and go within yourself. What are the qualities that those who know you, love you and look up to you see in you? Maybe it’s that you are loving, kind, fun, joyous, compassionate or gracious.
Do you believe that it’s even possible to be your best self?
I’ve almost come to accept that when I ask people to tell me about their best self, they will tell me about what they do. It’s rare for someone to start telling me about who they are and what’s in their heart. This reminds me of salvation by good deeds rather than what is in our heart.
The problem with doing as I see it is that my client case load is filled with people who feel inadequate that they aren’t doing enough. Trying to overcome anger, hurt, fear and sadness by doing things leads to stress and anxiety and often to hopelessness and despair.
When we are wrapped up in the performances of doing we recognize that others are doing more or better than we are. And even when we are doing great things, 70% of us experience the imposter syndrome. “What if they find out that I’m faking it and get busted?”
The actions of doing can quickly and easily lead to thoughts of inadequacy, not good enough, less than and a host of other judgements that beat you down. These judgements can easily result in depression, anxiety, loneliness and despair.
(From Chapter 1, Becoming the Greatest Expression of You)
Your Hypnosis Health Info Hypnotic Suggestion for today:
I close my eyelids and find stillness in this moment.
Celebrating 25 years of Medical Hypnosis with Roger Moore
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